When my 10-year old daughter brought down the tinsel tree from the attic - two weeks ago, so that puts us in mid-November - I won’t lie to you by sharing that instead of sheer holiday joy, I hyperventilated and cried. It was a Monday morning. We were on a roll with getting dressed, having enough breakfast to satisfy a morning belly during a Remote Morning Meeting for school, and I was methodically making a dent in the 4 baskets of laundry while making my work to-do list.
There is always talk of decorating for Holiday right after Halloween, and I pushed it off, kicked the can down the road, begging them if I could pick up and organize the house and attic enough before the Christmas decorations came down. So when I saw the tinsel, the amount of loss of control of what was about to happen was overwhelming. The Holiday Season is here, and that means many things, but most physically, it means spending money and existing in pure consumerism. Which as a kid is really fun! But as an adult, has formed an emerging outlook. But the season is so beautiful! And it’s fun to give gifts! But you may not have money. Oye, the agonizing toll. I first wrote about this over at the Highlands Current in 2018.
So here’s the deal. Here’s how we can make it through the holiday season during a pandemic, making it a lot of fun, even if you have no budget. And if you do have a budget, yay! If you don’t have a budget, we are going to yay this too!
ALBB As A Marketer
You’re going to see A Little Beacon Blog go bananas on Instagram for shopping. We usually do anyway, but we will during this season too. Keeping in mind that many of you may not be able to spend on anything at all. We are fans of small business and entrepreneurship, so we like to be a part of keeping people in business, which can give them financial and creative freedoms.
Shops On Main Street Need The Sales
At this point in the pandemic, shopping from the stores is a good deed. Where once retail therapy felt good for you, it is more of a mutual feeling than ever. These shops make our walking and driving experience in any town. If you want that experience to stay, then you need to buy something from the store. If you went into a store one time, and had a bad experience, or someone said or did something to make you mad, and you never go back again, you’re just hurting the vibe in which you live. So give them another try.
Wrap What You Recently Purchased
Holiday gifts don’t need to be purchased after Thanksgiving. That is not the rule. The rule is a feeling of giving and appreciation. If you recently bought a couch, or some shoes that you loved because they were on sale 2 months ago, wrap them. Remember what you have and recently invested in. It all counts!
Schedule Purchases After December 25th
You may need things, like fitness clothing. You may want this to be your gift. But, it goes on mega-sale in the big-box stores after December 25th. Like the Annual Sale at Victoria Secret, where their PINK line includes leggings, sweatshirts, etc. If these are the things you are asking for, let your people know, budget the money, and go after December 25th. If you all know this up front, waiting to make this purchase might make this easier.
Gently Push Back On Those Who Insist On Spending
Yes, we at ALBB encourage people to spend (doing so is our job sometimes!). But for those with no budget, not spending is real. One may either not have cash, or might go back into a cycle of debt. And those are not things we want to do. No debt! Try your best (speaking to the choir, here). Visualize a life with budget buckets, and your life with a pile of savings that you can live from long after you stop working. This doesn’t mean not spending. You can spend! The mindset just needs to shift into when we spend.
There may be people in your life who insist on spending on you, or your little ones. If it’s your own shared budget, and you don’t want to perpetuate the cycle of debt, or take from your safety net, keep talking about the progress of your debt diet, and how having a safety net is important. People build safety nets for emergencies, like when there is a pandemic. And there is a pandemic right now!!
People Who Insist On Spending Their Budgets On You Or Your Kids
Long ago, after donating many, many clothes from my kid’s over-stuffed drawers (we had a great hand-me-down source), I asked some gift-givers to not give us clothes, but to contribute to their college funds. When I bought clothes, I bought them from consignment stores or sale racks, and knew exactly what we needed when we needed it. So I didn’t want heaps of outfits. This did not go over well. The retail itch is strong in people, and wanted to be scratched.
Respecting that the retail itch in someone else is something that I cannot control, I try to direct the gifts to be part of the magical flow for my kids.
Talk About Your Debt Diet Or Money Savings and Growth Plans
Talking about savings - and financial planning - is not part of our normal dialogue. It could be. Showing and celebrating when we make dents in our debt can help keep the debt diet on track. Telling your people about how you want to pay off your car or your home or your outstanding bill somewhere will help them respect your wishes, and either direct their gifts there, or help you yourself not spend.
Making The Magic For Little Ones
Honestly, the holiday season is all about warmth, surprises and thoughtfulness. Surprises can come in many forms. Where once I was a hard “No” on the Elf on the Shelf, I came to terms with it because it brings my kids such joy, to wonder about the Elf and what it will do. We have 3 elves now (one for each child). And they even made an accidental appearance in September! Everyone was very confused. But it added to some fun.
Think of little surprises you can do for your little ones, that make them feel magic around them, that don’t cost anything, or are a part of what you need to get your kids anyway (like gloves). Ignore Instagram trends on what other parents are doing, if those overwhelm you. Do what you feel like is fun for your in your house. Use the elf to translate what you need to.
Teaching Your Little Ones To Make Magic - Activate Elf Magic
I’m not comfortable with the concept of lots gifts showing up without a budget. This is so unrealistic for kids to watch this in movies, and sets their expectations for a pile of presents just showing up. That’s a lot of financial pressure on parents! Instead, I share with my kids the concept of them being elves, and going to get things for people. Then put them in a secret place, because (ok, a little bit of magic is happening) the actual elves will do something to make them show up under the tree.
But this way, we all know what is coming.
Feeling “Enough”
When there are so. many. Instagrams and TikToks and commercials around us, suggesting we get this and that (and ALBB is a part of that), practice feeling “enough.” That feeling of calm, and that you have enough. Look at something around you - a piece of furniture, a journal, groceries, the heat coming out of your heater - and remember that it’s amazing. As for your little kids coming up to you wanting more more more, all I can tell you is….show them your bank account LOL.
Start paying them to clean your house so that they have their own budgets, and start buying their own things. I have different jobs with different rates, like sweeping and wiping down the stairs; Windexing the mirrors; spray-mopping the floor. They need to seek approval each time - because sometimes they just did it and it’s not dirty - but this is good training for a business mindset.
When they can or cannot afford something from their own bank account (if that’s their wallet or an actual bank account), they will truly learn the feeling of enough. And you won’t need to say “no” anymore or as much.
Feeling Sheer Holiday Joy - Feel The Love
During this time in the pandemic, we all need to feel happy. We do! There is a lot of sorrow around us. And those of you with budgets, you are wanting to contribute your means to help other people with their means. That is AMAZING.
Feel OK to feel joy. And keep on with being aware of others and what they need, and helping them and you get there.
Happy Holidays. The Holiday season is OPEN.
